


The Setting Suns

by jeeno2



Series: Rebelcaptain Stories [5]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Future, Angst, Children, F/M, Family, Fluff, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-02
Updated: 2017-01-02
Packaged: 2018-09-14 08:02:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9169810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jeeno2/pseuds/jeeno2
Summary: Jyn and Cassian become parents.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Written for a tumblr prompt: "Oh my God, you're in love with her."

Jyn thinks of lots of different ways to tell him.

This is something he’s wanted – that they’ve both wanted, really – for so long.  Ever since the war finally ended and they realized, all at once, that they no longer had to be afraid.  

It was so long ago, their decision to do this, to just _go_ for it, that in truth she’d almost forgotten all about it.  But last night, while Cassian was sleeping, she’d had a strange, indescribable feeling that something, deep inside of her, had changed in a permanent, fundamental way. 

An hour later, she sat crouched in a small ball on their bathroom floor, shocked out of her wits, gripping the little test with the two pink lines on it tightly in her fist.  

And she continued to sit there, staring at it, until the suns rose.  

Does she still want this to happen to her?  To them?  For the first time in her life she feels safe, secure, happy.  She knows Cassian does as well.  

Either way, she supposes, when she finally picks herself up off the floor -- there’s no denying that this is here, and it's real, and it's happening.

 

* * *

“I’m pregnant,” she tells him when he comes home the next afternoon.  Just like that.  Jyn’s never been one for ceremony or for mincing words.  In the end, she decides there’s no need to hide the news from him or to wrap it up in a pretty bow.

He’d been out all morning, chopping wood for their new fire-burning stove.  At her words the logs in his arms come crashing down to the floor.  He’s across the room in two long strides and he gathers her into his arms, picking her up off her feet and spinning her around and around, laughing and crying with giddy joy.

As he spins her, as he kisses her, she realizes this is everything she never knew she wanted during all of those horrible years -- the way Cassian looks at her right now and the safe, loved, cherished way he makes her feel whenever she looks back at him.

 

* * *

When Jyn feels the baby move for the first time her life divides, in a clean instant, into a _before_ and an _after_.

The rational part of her brain knows this is normal.  That this is exactly what’s supposed to happen.  But rationality evaporates like dew in the morning sunlight with the first _flutter flutter kickkickkick_ she feels not so much in her belly as in her very soul.  All at once, all of her old fears of death and abandonment come back, unbidden, crashing down on her in a torrent of blinding pain.

“I think I’m in love with you,“ she admits to their child, choking out the words on a quiet sob, standing on the stool in their new kitchen, as she rubs her hands over her swollen stomach.  She wills their unborn child to understand what she’s saying and what she isn’t.  "And _gods_ , I’m terrified.“

That night she spends hours locked in the sorts of nightmares she hasn’t suffered from in years.  In her dreams she’s running again.  She’s killing and trying not to be killed.  She’s hanging on for dear life to that terrible ledge back in Scarif while Cassian falls to his death beside her, over and over again, as she looks on helplessly, powerless to save him.  

It takes Cassian hours that night to coax her awake and bring her back to the him in the present.

"What if we can't keep her safe?" she asks him, sobbing, tears streaming down her face.

He tightens his hold on her and kisses the top of her head.  "We can," he promises her.  He kisses her again, and again.  "We  _will_." 

 

* * *

The months pass quickly, and yet so slowly.  Jyn feels like she’s trapped in a horrific, sticky resin that makes all her movements sluggish and slow.  At the same time she’s also full of an uncontrollable, fidgety energy that makes sitting still impossible.

Jyn doesn’t think she could really describe it to anyone, how she feels.  So she doesn’t try.

She gets big, and bigger, and then bigger still in what feels like the blink of an eye.  She hates it, though she won’t admit that to Cassian, who still looks at her blossoming body every night like she hung the moon.  Her body is not truly her own anymore, and after years spent running and hiding and fighting for her life that’s something she’ll never get used to.

She still goes flying as often she can, trying to ignore how much harder it is now to wedge herself behind the control panel of her jet.  

 

* * *

About two years after their Lyra is born, the three of them are having a picnic together in the meadow near their home on Fest when their daughter says her first words.

“Dada! Mama!” she says, giggling and dancing and jumping around in that special way of hers. She has her smile, much to Cassian’s delight, and his bright brown eyes.  Lyra toddles over to them from where she’s been playing all afternoon, chubby arms outstretched, her sweet tiny fists crammed with wildflowers. 

“Oh, Lyra  -- they’re beautiful!” Cassian exclaims, grinning from ear to ear, so besotted with their daughter it makes Jyn's heart ache. 

“Oh, my god – you’re in love with her,” Jyn says, teasing her husband.  But her smile is as wideas his.  She takes the flowers from her little girl and brings them up to her nose.  “Lyra, darling– they smell wonderful.”

Lyra laughs, then, turning around and around in circles the way she does whenever she gets very excited.  It isn't long before her infectious energy brings Cassian, and then Jyn, to their feet as well.

They stay there for hours that day, dancing and playing together, and creating beautiful new memories until the twin suns set over the horizon.


End file.
